I'm debating about my referral request. It's going to be about a hundred years before I see my girl's face. My kids will not be three or four years apart -- more like six. That's a big difference from what I expected going into this process. I had made my request 0-6 months because I was worried about attachment, and the timelines from referral to travel seemed pretty long when I started this process. But now, court is moving along much quicker, and IA has changed their policy to now allow parents to travel to get their munchkins (and stay in Ethiopia until visas are issued) right after court.
All of these things change the game a bit. And seeing as how we're creeping up on two years of waiting and I don't want any lapse in my file, and will have to get it updated soon anyway, I'm thinking I may change my referral request too. I think I'll accept 0-18 months. Baby will be with me before age two, and I will have plenty of time off for bonding after court passes, and besides, my referral will come earlier, so my kids will be more like 4 1/2 years apart. It seems logical and reasonable to me. Feedback, people?
Home!
8 years ago
6 comments:
Go for it!!! These decisions are so exciting.... :)
I say go for it. The sooner you're a family the better. My oldest was 12 when we stated the process and she leaves for University in the fall. She's afariad her 18 mo brother won't know who she is.
Lorie
Good luck with your decision - not an easy one. Go with what feels more right to you. Let us know.
Janice
it's hard to plan when there are so many unknows.. like if you were to plan on her being younger than 2 and then something delaying that and she be even older. i upped my age limit (for other reasons) and met my daughter at 21 months. adopting a toddler is HARD but a lot of fun, too. my opinion would be to definitely increase to 18 months if it shortens your wait and decreases the differences in their ages. good luck!
Sorry to leave a comment here, but please send an email to me when you have a chance. I need to ask you about something.
This may not be helpful, but I would say follow your heart. My thoughts are that God already knows the child who will become part of your family and if He is nudging your heart to open up the age limit, then go for it!
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