Renewed

We had Teachers' Convention this past week, and I am feeling energized and ready to power through to the end of the school year. I am throwing out testing in my Social 6 class, as the studies show that testing students causes teachers to teach to the test, which in turn does not allow students the same depth of learning as if they had no tests. Apparently in Japan, the government tried to institute achievement tests and the teachers rebelled. Refused to break the cellophane. And so they were not implemented, and haven't been. And the Japanese system is one to look at for in-depth understanding by students. We're upping the number of projects, and decreasing the amount of reading from the text. The text is a reference. Not a Bible. So we'll see how this goes, and how many frantic parents call.
A great site for teachers, if you happen to be one, is BigHugeLabs. I love it. So many things you can do with the programs on that site. I'm using the magazine maker to have students research and present a Current Events news story. And they are pumped about it! I had a line up of students asking if they could go first! Now that is good news to me!
Slow progress on the adoption front, but I've got my emotions in check and I don't think the wait will kill me any time soon. I have other things to worry about now -- like revamping my entire year plan! I'll post again once I've dug my way out of curriculum!

Mer.

That's how I'm feeling lately, which is why I haven't been blogging. I don't want to throw a wet blanket out, when people are starting to get hyped and pumped about the possibility of referrals coming their way. But I'm. just. tired. Tired of waiting, of having people ask, "I thought you were adopting? When's that happening?" And all I can say now is, "Someday." What else can I say? Even in light of referrals coming, it feels like it's a very distant thing for me.
I'm not real proud of how I'm feeling, but a big part of me goes, I wish I'd done the foster-to-adopt through the Alberta government. Because I'd have had my second child oh, probably a year and a half ago. And I wouldn't be paying of this giant line of credit that weighs me down. And I wouldn't have to keep thinking about this hypothetical daughter, because I'd have the real deal. I'm not real patient, and I know many months from now when my referral comes, I'll have to wait even longer. And it'll only get harder.
I'm tempted to keep myself from looking at my daughter's pictures until the visa is issued and I can travel. Because for me to think of this real little girl, growing up in an orphanage when she should be in my arms, is going to kill me. I thought for a long time, that I could wait and wait, but I'm past 15 1/2 months now, and I still see no light in the tunnel. And I'm getting discouraged. I need to harden my heart a little, which doesn't sound like a good thing, but when the alternative is to be crushed by the wait and the discouragement, maybe toughening up isn't so bad. I need to be able to see that there will be an end to it. And while in my head I know it, my heart is not convinced.

January in Pictures

Inspired by fellow blogger Laura, I am trying to take a picture a day, but it's not really been so successful. It's more like several pictures taken every other day. These are the first couple of weeks of January for us (from most recent to least -- that's just the way it worked out when I uploaded the pics).